Hebrews 3:14 “holding our first newborn confidence and original assured expectation firm and unshaken to the end
When I was a newborn
kicking and screaming
unable to save myself
Unable to walk
only able to cry out
You saved me
You cared for me
You cleansed me
wrapped me safe, sweet smelling
And You fed me
and birthed in me
An Assured Expectation
that was Firm
and Unshaken to the ends of my very world,
That You would hear my cries
and quiet them
by giving me
what I needed…
And now I am
O, so much older and wiser
And many, many a time
I have cried
and though You say You heard me,
quieted my tears
by giving me what I thought I needed…
That assured expectation
that was originally a part
of my very breathing?
a thing of the past.
And I seem to have lost my footing, Lord.
My assurance and expectation
is that yes,
all will be made right.
But what of all those crying today?
Are You coming to their rescue?
Children huddled under blankets
shamed from the touch,
hungry from the lack,
thirsty for rescue.
Mothers weeping at windows
Prodigals marching in defiance
wanting nothing to do with You,
Bodies wasting disease filled,
Minds wandering jigsaw puzzled.
And I keep stumbling over my expectations
Tripping over my own definitions
of What Your power
and should be.
For I am no longer a newborn babe,
unable to walk, think, see…
O no, I am wise now, Lord.
“Did He really say He was the father of the fatherless? That He came for the afflicted, poor, needy? that he would set the lonely into families?”
And I question, in such a righteous manner,
Your Power, Wisdom, Goodness.
I especially question Your timing
Your ability to squeeze good water from evil stone
Your Promise to work all things for good,
And instead of trusting,
crying out “Lord, I am helpless!”
and use my wise sight, my wise ways of observing
and drawing conclusions,
and refuse to wait,
like a weaned child.
I feed on my own wisdom, which leaves me empty, hopeless, lost, despairing of life itself.
I question You
instead of questioning my own thinking
This arrogance of mind and continual straying from Truth that
You mean what You say and Say what You mean…
And I think, perhaps,
one MUST STAY
like a newborn baby
who can only cry,
loud and helpless,
With Assured Confidence,
and Yes, Expectation
that You Will Do All You Say,
and it is impossibly impossible ever and ever
for You to Not act on the behalf of Your children,
But like a child I must wait, mustn’t I, Lord.
Wait, Child, You tell me
I am coming.
And All will be made Right
Parents WILL receive their children back from the dead,
faith WILL be sight
and Good will be Good
and tears turned to joy.
I am Here, but I also Am Coming.
And I am not a man that I should lie.
Hold fast your confidence, child of Mine,
your assured expectation
firm and unshaken
until the end,
Which will be, child of Mine,